When People-Pleasing Becomes a Snare
“The fear of man brings a snare; but whoever puts his trust in the Lord shall be safe.”
—Proverbs 29:25 (ESV)
Every day, we face the subtle temptation to shape our words and our lives around what others will think. George Everard reminds us that this “fear of man” isn’t harmless, “it stops many a one on the very threshold of the kingdom,” he writes, and “mars the usefulness and stays the progress of many true servants of the Lord.”
It’s a pointed image: you’re an eager pilgrim, ready to press on, and suddenly you’re caught in a trap of your own making. You hesitate to speak the truth. You water down your convictions. You confess Christ in whispers or not at all.
Biblical Examples of the Snare
Everard pulls from Scripture to show how even the heroes of our faith stumbled:
- Abraham lied about Sarah (Gen. 12; 20) out of fear of local rulers.
- Peter denied Christ three times, “for fear of the soldiers” (John 18:17–27).
- Though not a hero of the faith, Pilate, “for fear of the crowd,” handed over the innocent Savior to be crucified (John 19:12–16). g
These aren’t ancient curiosities, they’re warnings that fear of man can lead us to downright sin, defaming our witness and crippling our service.
How “People-Pleasing” Turns Sinful
Everard highlights two practical evils:
- Downright Positive Sin
A well-intentioned youth may, “linked with young companions…dare not go against them,” and so falls into vice, lying, cruelty, wasted time, all for fear of being “left out.” - Covering One’s Faults
A small misstep that could be confessed promptly becomes “the parent of innumerable petty artifices,” as the young man hides and excuses, his character compromised far more than by the original slip.
In counseling, I’ve seen adults still trapped by these same snares: confessing sins only privately, avoiding accountability, sacrificing integrity on the altar of public opinion.
Shifting Our Fear from Man to God
Solomon gives us the cure: “whoever puts his trust in the Lord shall be safe.” (Prov. 29:25, ESV.) But what does that look like in practice?
- Remember Whose Opinion Matters
Jesus said, “Do not be afraid of those who kill the body and after that can do no more.
But I will show you whom you should fear: Fear him who, after he has killed, has authority to cast into hell.” Luke 12:4–5 (ESV) The worst people can do is to kill your body. God, on the other hand, holds your eternal destiny in His hands. - Cultivate a Habit of Boldness
“A bold and consistent Christian course will soon secure you the respect of those whose good opinion is worth having,” Everard assures. If you’re tired of looking like everyone else, take a small step today, speak truth in love, share your faith on social media, or simply open your Bible at the dinner table. - Anchor in Community
Fear of man thrives in isolation. Find a small group or accountability partner who will encourage you to stand firm, who values Christ above comfort and cultural capital.
Practical Next Steps
- Prayer: Ask God to reveal where you’ve been people-pleasing rather than God-glorifying.
- Scripture Meditation: Memorize Prov. 29:25 and Luke 12:4–5 in the ESV. Let these verses be your battle standard.
- Action: Identify one situation this week where you’ve toned down your convictions. Choose to act courageously and say no, speak up, and confess openly.
Quick humor to lighten the load: fearing man is a bit like wearing mismatched socks inside sandals. You worry people will laugh that you can’t match, but that isn’t even the beginning of your problems! Let’s trade that awkward get-up for the full armor of God (Eph. 6:11–18), confident that when we stand for Christ, we stand in victory.
Further Reading
George Everard’s classic meditation on this subject is worth the full read. You can find it here:
https://www.gracegems.org/Everard/fear_of_man.htm
